T has a secret TV addiction: The Maury Povich Show. And while we were both off work on FMLA, we watched more DNA tests and lie detector results than I care to say. And of course on T’s days off, he still rushes home to see the latest episode.
Well, today Maury asked the viewers "Should you live together before getting married? Or should you take the more traditional route and wait?"
...Really, Maury?
No offense, but your guests aren't exactly the "traditional" type. But T and I took the question seriously, and it started an interesting conversation.
T mockingly quoted the old-school saying, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" (To which I pretended to be insulted that he called me a "cow".)
But I think this question seemed relevant to us for the same reason I began this blog. Just because we did not choose the same path as our great-grandparents, does that make our family any less functional, ordinary, or legitimate? I am friends with a few couples who went the “traditional” route: dated, got engaged, got married, moved in together. Unfortunately, their marriage wasn’t exactly what they hoped, so they thought having a baby would fix their problems. Wrong. Now they are even worse than before.
Of course these few examples are not indicators of how everyone’s life will be, but it made me realize that there is more than one way to achieve a healthy family. And right now, T, TJ, and I have a completely functional and loving family, and I would not trade our experiences for the world!
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Wedding Crashers
T and I had been in the house all day today and the baby was getting fussy, so we decided to take a ride. While we were out, we decided to pass by Atrium at Treetops so T could see where it is. I showed him the building and the garage parking, and we noticed there was an event going on. Well T, being the most adventurous man I've ever known, decides to go inside! At first I waited in the car, but T made friends with a tipsy groomsman; next thing I know, T, the baby, and I were in the lobby looking over the festivities.
Needless to say, the event was spectacular. I especially love that they used the lounge furniture with the standard tables.
I also loved the uplighting. And the reception was masquerade themed and I LOVED the bridesmaids' dresses!
I'm glad T pulled me in to see the venue in action. That's why I love him: he challenges me and takes me out of my comfort zone. And now I think we agree on a wedding venue top choice!
Needless to say, the event was spectacular. I especially love that they used the lounge furniture with the standard tables.
I also loved the uplighting. And the reception was masquerade themed and I LOVED the bridesmaids' dresses!
I'm glad T pulled me in to see the venue in action. That's why I love him: he challenges me and takes me out of my comfort zone. And now I think we agree on a wedding venue top choice!
Friday, February 24, 2012
Friday is "Bride"day
Friday is "Bride"day on TLC, and the channel features Say Yes to the Dress and Four Weddings during their prime time slots. I will admit, I have never been a fan of SYTTD because I can't imagine spending $3-5k on JUST my dress for the big day. I may be a bit optimistic, but I hope to spend about that much money on my attire, T's attire, and food and drink for 120 people.
But I digress... my new favorite show is Four Weddings! And what has surprised me the most is that T likes the show as well (but, don't tell him I told you that; he won't admit it in public). In fact, he and I raced home from a meeting tonight in order to catch the newest episode.
The idea of the show is that four different brides attend each other's weddings and score the wedding in four categories: venue, food, dress, and overall experience. If you catch me on twitter, you will probably see the scores I give to each wedding and my prediction for the winner.
So in honor of my new favorite obsession (which could put me on another TLC show, My Strange Addiction), I am announcing my own version of Friday is "Bride"day in which I will introduce the latest DIY tip or wedding day idea that I have found in my quest for the perfect big day! Hope you enjoy them :-)
But I digress... my new favorite show is Four Weddings! And what has surprised me the most is that T likes the show as well (but, don't tell him I told you that; he won't admit it in public). In fact, he and I raced home from a meeting tonight in order to catch the newest episode.
The idea of the show is that four different brides attend each other's weddings and score the wedding in four categories: venue, food, dress, and overall experience. If you catch me on twitter, you will probably see the scores I give to each wedding and my prediction for the winner.
So in honor of my new favorite obsession (which could put me on another TLC show, My Strange Addiction), I am announcing my own version of Friday is "Bride"day in which I will introduce the latest DIY tip or wedding day idea that I have found in my quest for the perfect big day! Hope you enjoy them :-)
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Two Months Old
Our little bundle of joy is two months old today, and he is anything but "little". Tipping the scale at 11 pounds, he is almost double his birth weight. T and I are enjoying the moments of discovery that TJ is starting to have. He enjoys swatting at the owls hanging from his swing. And he definitely recognizes T or me when we come into the room.
He isn't sleeping through the night yet, though. And sometimes he thinks 2am is playtime. But he is a great baby and I wouldn't trade him for the world.
Pray for us: he has his two month check up today, and he gets his next round of vaccines. I really don't want to watch them stick him (yes, I'm a punk). I'll let you know what happens...
He isn't sleeping through the night yet, though. And sometimes he thinks 2am is playtime. But he is a great baby and I wouldn't trade him for the world.
Pray for us: he has his two month check up today, and he gets his next round of vaccines. I really don't want to watch them stick him (yes, I'm a punk). I'll let you know what happens...
Saturday, February 18, 2012
An "Honest" Woman
Warning: this is a venting post. Govern yourself accordingly.
This is how a conversation went this morning:
Me: "Good morning!"
Her: "Good morning, how is the baby?!"
Me: "Doing great! He's eating a lot, and getting big."
Her: "That's wonderful. So when is T going to finally make you an honest woman?"
Me: .....*blank stare*
You see now why this is a "vent" post?! If I wasn't a blessed and saved person, I would tell her it's none of her business (adding in some choice expletives as well). But I am a punk, so I just smiled and said, "We'll see."
What really gets me is that this person had NO IDEA how offensive she was. Am I not already an honest woman? I am certainly not deceitful or disloyal. So the implication that I am not "honest" just because I am a mother and not married is insulting.
That's why T and I are waiting awhile before we get married. We want to make sure it is out of love, not obligation. T and I have both seen what happens when marriages fail for lack of a solid foundation, and we will NOT start our lives on unstable ground.
Some people need to stick to their own business and leave mine alone.
This is how a conversation went this morning:
Me: "Good morning!"
Her: "Good morning, how is the baby?!"
Me: "Doing great! He's eating a lot, and getting big."
Her: "That's wonderful. So when is T going to finally make you an honest woman?"
Me: .....*blank stare*
You see now why this is a "vent" post?! If I wasn't a blessed and saved person, I would tell her it's none of her business (adding in some choice expletives as well). But I am a punk, so I just smiled and said, "We'll see."
What really gets me is that this person had NO IDEA how offensive she was. Am I not already an honest woman? I am certainly not deceitful or disloyal. So the implication that I am not "honest" just because I am a mother and not married is insulting.
That's why T and I are waiting awhile before we get married. We want to make sure it is out of love, not obligation. T and I have both seen what happens when marriages fail for lack of a solid foundation, and we will NOT start our lives on unstable ground.
Some people need to stick to their own business and leave mine alone.
Location:3rd St NW,Washington,United States
New Mommy Worries/ Technology Dependence
A few days ago I ran to the store to pick up a few items. I decided that since I was out by myself and T was home with the baby, I could make a few extra stops and enjoy a little "me time". So I reached to call my favorite nail salon for a quick mani, when I discovered I did not have my cell phone.
Before I was a Mom, this didn't raise any alarms. Of course I would be slightly annoyed that I couldn't Facebook/Tweet/Text for a few hours. But I would tell myself that it's a good thing to be away from all that for awhile.
But now that I am a new mom, I completely FREAKED OUT! Every terrible scenario I could imagine raced through my head, as I felt my blood pressure begin to escalate.
"What if something happens to T and the baby?!"
"What if I get in a car accident?"
"Oh no, what if a comet falls from the sky...?!"
....you get the idea.
Needless to say, that was the LONGEST ride home. Of course nothing happened, but I learned my lesson: my phone will always be charged and ready and IN MY PURSE.
Before I was a Mom, this didn't raise any alarms. Of course I would be slightly annoyed that I couldn't Facebook/Tweet/Text for a few hours. But I would tell myself that it's a good thing to be away from all that for awhile.
But now that I am a new mom, I completely FREAKED OUT! Every terrible scenario I could imagine raced through my head, as I felt my blood pressure begin to escalate.
"What if something happens to T and the baby?!"
"What if I get in a car accident?"
"Oh no, what if a comet falls from the sky...?!"
....you get the idea.
Needless to say, that was the LONGEST ride home. Of course nothing happened, but I learned my lesson: my phone will always be charged and ready and IN MY PURSE.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Atrium at Treetops
I went to tour the Atrium at Treetops today. Wow! The pictures and reviews are not an exaggeration; the place is gorgeous! Even on a weekday morning when the offices are occupied and business people are walking through my photos, I can see how amazing this venue is.
I think I am in trouble: I have fallen in love with the Atrium at Treetops for the wedding and reception. And when I fall in love, it takes quite a lot for me to change my mind. This is the same way I made up my mind to be a Mom. And I did everything I needed to achieve exactly what I set my mind to.
...oh goody! As I was typing, I received a proposal email from Jessica at the Atrium. T and I are going to read all the info and let you know what we think!
I think I am in trouble: I have fallen in love with the Atrium at Treetops for the wedding and reception. And when I fall in love, it takes quite a lot for me to change my mind. This is the same way I made up my mind to be a Mom. And I did everything I needed to achieve exactly what I set my mind to.
...oh goody! As I was typing, I received a proposal email from Jessica at the Atrium. T and I are going to read all the info and let you know what we think!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Planning a Valentine's Ball
T and I will (prayerfully) be elected to lead our fraternal organization in 2013, and we have been doing some major planning to get ready. The biggest project we are working on is the annual Sweetheart Ball. This event is a charitable fundraiser, and it is centered around Valentine's Day. In fact, the event will be exactly one year from today, and you are all welcome!
Thrift #12 56th Annual Sweetheart Ball
Yesterday, we visited the venue, Comfort Inn and Suites on New York Avenue, for a walk-through of the space, and we got excited all over again. Ebony, the sales manager, was so helpful, and the space fit our needs perfectly. Needless to say, we will be signing a contract on Tuesday to secure next February's date.
Planning this event with T will give me some real insight into how we will work together to plan other things (the wedding, our son's birthdays, etc). So we will see how this goes. For now, I am just happy we decided on the location so we can get the "ball" rolling.
Thrift #12 56th Annual Sweetheart Ball
Yesterday, we visited the venue, Comfort Inn and Suites on New York Avenue, for a walk-through of the space, and we got excited all over again. Ebony, the sales manager, was so helpful, and the space fit our needs perfectly. Needless to say, we will be signing a contract on Tuesday to secure next February's date.
Planning this event with T will give me some real insight into how we will work together to plan other things (the wedding, our son's birthdays, etc). So we will see how this goes. For now, I am just happy we decided on the location so we can get the "ball" rolling.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
How T and I Met
Last night, as T and I were rubbing our son's chest to relieve his congestion, T asked me a very interesting question: "Why do you want to marry me?"
I answered him without thinking: "Because I love you".
But then I really thought about it, and I began recounting our first meeting...
You could say we met on Facebook, since that is where our communication began. But as we got to know each other, we realized our paths had crossed long before the 'friend request'. We have quite a few friends and coworkers in common; I even discovered he had a picture of me from a party we both attended almost 6 months before we officially met.
And then the day came when we saw each other in person. My best friend (and now Maid of Honor) Lo had invited me to an inaugural meeting, and what do you know? T was speaking at that very same meeting! I am extremely attracted to men who are well spoken, and T's speech melted my heart. Because of his seat in the front, he did not notice me there until he was about to leave. As he headed for the door, our eyes met and, as the cliche goes, time slowed. He moved toward me and we pulled each other into a hug that made every other person in the room melt away. It was absolute magic.
So that's what I told him in response to "why do you want to marry me?" I told him that I had never felt magic with any other person, and I want to spend the rest of my life consumed in that magic that can only be God's love. Here's to Happily Ever After...
Happy Valentine's Day!
I answered him without thinking: "Because I love you".
But then I really thought about it, and I began recounting our first meeting...
You could say we met on Facebook, since that is where our communication began. But as we got to know each other, we realized our paths had crossed long before the 'friend request'. We have quite a few friends and coworkers in common; I even discovered he had a picture of me from a party we both attended almost 6 months before we officially met.
And then the day came when we saw each other in person. My best friend (and now Maid of Honor) Lo had invited me to an inaugural meeting, and what do you know? T was speaking at that very same meeting! I am extremely attracted to men who are well spoken, and T's speech melted my heart. Because of his seat in the front, he did not notice me there until he was about to leave. As he headed for the door, our eyes met and, as the cliche goes, time slowed. He moved toward me and we pulled each other into a hug that made every other person in the room melt away. It was absolute magic.
So that's what I told him in response to "why do you want to marry me?" I told him that I had never felt magic with any other person, and I want to spend the rest of my life consumed in that magic that can only be God's love. Here's to Happily Ever After...
Happy Valentine's Day!
Monday, February 13, 2012
Welcome to the Journey!
Welcome to Newborn before Nuptials!
I created this blog after my pregnancy experience left me elated about Motherhood, but concerned about the implications that my beautiful family would not be considered "traditional" or "legitimate" since my partner Thomas and I are not married. The truth is that Thomas and I planned our family from the beginning. We both wanted to be parents and we weighed the pros and cons of our decision. So why should I feel less than equal to any other new expecting parents? In this day and age, what makes one family any more legitimate than another?
Those are the questions that the magazine American Baby asked in their article "First Comes Baby..." in the February 2012 issue. After citing the recently popular statistic that about 50 percent of marriages end in divorce, the author Sara Lippmann applauds the ever-growing diversity of modern nuclear families. Mostly I agreed with the other mothers that were interviewed: marriage does not hold the same longevity that it once did, but being a parent is forever.
And that is what brings me to writing this blog post while breast feeding my new bundle of joy. Thomas and I are loving the new parent life. And we are realizing that we are even more in love with each other and our newborn son every day. So now we find ourselves looking to tie the knot (though I have not officially gotten the ring yet).
Follow me as I take two life-changing journeys simultaneously: wedding planning and new Mom milestones. I'm sure it will be full of challenges, but it's worth it to gain the achievements!
I created this blog after my pregnancy experience left me elated about Motherhood, but concerned about the implications that my beautiful family would not be considered "traditional" or "legitimate" since my partner Thomas and I are not married. The truth is that Thomas and I planned our family from the beginning. We both wanted to be parents and we weighed the pros and cons of our decision. So why should I feel less than equal to any other new expecting parents? In this day and age, what makes one family any more legitimate than another?
Those are the questions that the magazine American Baby asked in their article "First Comes Baby..." in the February 2012 issue. After citing the recently popular statistic that about 50 percent of marriages end in divorce, the author Sara Lippmann applauds the ever-growing diversity of modern nuclear families. Mostly I agreed with the other mothers that were interviewed: marriage does not hold the same longevity that it once did, but being a parent is forever.
And that is what brings me to writing this blog post while breast feeding my new bundle of joy. Thomas and I are loving the new parent life. And we are realizing that we are even more in love with each other and our newborn son every day. So now we find ourselves looking to tie the knot (though I have not officially gotten the ring yet).
Follow me as I take two life-changing journeys simultaneously: wedding planning and new Mom milestones. I'm sure it will be full of challenges, but it's worth it to gain the achievements!
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